Sunday, June 2, 2024

My "A" Team

Dear Aaron,

Tuesday was Andrew's birthday, your "A Team" sidekick. But true to form, Tuesday was a bit busy. 

Andrew did take the day off, but I didn't get home until after 7 again. I did stop and buy his favorite doughnuts from Walmart. I bought two boxes: one of his favorites and then one for the rest of us. He asked if he could have a second (or third?) from his box and I told him those were his, to do what he wants with him.

His exclamation of surprise reminded me of a little kid at Christmas. His grin was so reminiscent of yours.

He's an awesome young man, and he's been such a great brother for you. He would totally tease you and you would go right back at him. The last picture we have of him holding you in the hospital, so raw, so painful, so full of love was his Facebook profile pic for a long time. 

He is so proud of you.

We are so proud of both of you. 

I'm sure you're very proud of him.

So since Tuesday was kinda crazy, we'll celebrate him today, the other half of our A Team. 

He wears your initial around his neck daily. I suspect that most people think it's for him. It's not. It's for you.

Recently a mom asked how to tell her children that the baby she is carrying won't be here very long. I remember telling your older siblings about you. Each had a different reaction. Andrew was not quite seven at the time. His birthday was just over two weeks before yours. Somehow it didn't make sense in his little six-year-old brain. He would just go on with life, and then usually at least a couple times a week he would pause and look at me and ask, "Why can't babies like ours live very long?" And honestly, most of the time I would just reply, "I don't know." 

But he knew he loved you, he wanted another little brother, and to him, that's pretty much who you were. 


We took you to the Alpine Days parade that year and were hoping to find close parking, mostly to be able to escape if you struggled. It was so hot, and you were so tiny and fragile. So Daddy asked a policeman if there was handicapped parking somewhere, and from the back of the car, Andrew piped up, "Who is handicapped?" 

He didn't see you that way. You were just his brother. 

You have shaped us into the people we are today, much better than we were before.

We love you so much. Thank you for being part of our family.

Miss you.

Love,
Mama

"No individual can a win a game by himself."

- Pele


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