Sunday, April 16, 2017

Easter Lessons

This week's been a rough one.  Between the hospital (kid apparently had to get his Primary's fix) and working full time (since subs don't get paid time off) I've been run ragged. All the plans for the days leading up to Easter didn't get thrown out the window.  They weren't even remembered to be able to be thrown out until it was too late. Yeah, the Easter bunny came, and we went to Easter Services this morning, but with all the hoopla and lead-up to Christmas, I feel like Easter needs a bit more focus.  A bit more of Jesus, a bit more of reverence, a bit more of me.  And it just didn't happen.

It seemed like all I could do just to keep moving forward, to keep suctioning, turning up (and down) the oxygen, keep on top (sorta) of kids doing their homework and other activities.  It was hard, really hard.  I felt I didn't measure up.  I couldn't not only do it all, I could barely do any of it.  And it hurt.  I was just so, so tired and overwhelmed and exhausted (did I say that already?).

Anyway, so yesterday while we were putting together the Easter baskets and filling plastic eggs with jelly beans, we found some papers.  Last year (or maybe the year before) we had taken some time during Easter week to write down our thoughts about Jesus and His sacrifice, and what He means to us. 

I was reminded, it's okay.  Perfection is not needed or even expected.  My younger (and sometimes wiser) self wrote,
"He is my Savior and Lord, but even more, He is my friend.  And I know that He wants me to be happy and be with him, so I will trust Him and follow Him and try to be like Him. 

The scripture that I chose was Isaiah 61:3
"To appoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they might be called the trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that He might be glorified."

I don't have to do everything, be everything.

Does that mean everything was all of a sudden wonderful?  Nope, I'm still very much human, and so are all the humans who inhabit my house, and the ones who come back.  But I felt fed, given beauty, and exchanged my garment of heaviness for one of praise.

Aaron's doing well, as well as can be expected when he's still finishing a cold.  But usually we spent 7-10 days in the hospital, at least.  And from my calculations, we're just approaching the end.  His oxygen fluctuates and the steroid side effects have  been a bit rough.  But he's back in school.  He was part of a (quite funny) Easter egg hunt yesterday.  And Daddy made him his very own Easter egg with his favorite color (red) and "I love Aaron" on it.

So grateful for Easter, for this season, for the empty tomb and all it represents.  And grateful for my own renewal.

Thou hast turned for me my mourning into dancing: thou hast put off my sackcloth, and girded me with gladness; to the end that my glory may sing praise to thee, and not be silent. O Lord my God, I will give thanks unto thee for ever.
Psalm 30:11-12

1 comment:

  1. He sure is precious! I myself has a sweet little sunshine just like Aaron! Our Annia is 2 months today! We are grateful for each day that we get to hold, kiss and love our beautiful Annia! Much love to your sweet Aaron :)