Missing You, Still, Always...

Hey Superman,

It's been a few days. Frankly, somewhat rough days.

Gramma is still in the hospital and both she and Grampa also have Covid. Sigh.... Fortunately, they're both improving and here's hoping that it's just a glitch. We still don't know what's going on with Gramma but she is getting stronger. Are you part of this? Are you hanging out in the hospital yet again? I mean, you did love your "vacation home."

And they loved you, too.

Tomorrow is graduation, Aaron. 

Michael is graduating and we will be done with public education. It seems so weird! 

I mean, I guess it's time? Except it's not. I expected to be registering you for high school, for seminary, and although you'd still be in the same wonderful school, you would be moving forward.  And I'd still get emails and do parent teacher conference, and dance festivals and first and last day of school pictures, and, and, and...

And I guess it's not happening. 

You're not going to school here. Do you go to school there? Do you have recess? Run? Play? Jump, yell and laugh?

The quiet almost cuts like a knife still. 

Time moves on. 

150 days, five months on Thursday. That seems so long, and yet so short. I see your pictures and I'm gutted again, but I also smile. I'm learning that I can feel the grief and still be okay (mostly). I put together Michael's slide show and you show up quite a few times. You two grew up together. He was my sidekick for that time after Andrew started school and then when you came along, you joined and we became a threesome. 

Now you're gone, and he's going, and it's hard. 

Tomorrow is all about Michael. It's his day. But tonight I am mourning you, and your relationship with Michael. I think I've said before that it's probably good you went before he left. You would have been lost without him, kinda like I'm lost without you. 

Miss you so much, little man. 

Love you even more,
Mama

"Love knows not its own depth until the hour of separation."

- Kahlil Gibran