How to Get Out of Church

I know a lot of kids (and a few adults) who try to come up with ways to get out of church, school, and anything else they didn't want to do.  I've seen the "normal" excuses:  headache, stomach ache, plain ol' too tired.  I came up with a few good ones on my own in high school (not telling what they were, sometimes my kids read this).

When you get do get to church, there's the eeking at a sibling, talking loudly, crying, screaming if nothing else works.  But not my Aaron.  Nope, he's got to do things his very own way.  Those are all way too tame for him.  He focuses on the breathing excuse.

Oh so happy through the vast majority of church, he decided it was too long today.  Fifteen minutes before the rest of us were done, he was done.  Heart rate in the 130's+, oxygen sats in the low 80's.  His oxygen tank was low, so I changed it out.  No dice.  Even on six, seven and eight liters he was in the low 80's, and even down into the mid to high 70's.  So I started bagging him and yep, he got to come home.

How's he doing now?  He's laughing and talking in his  bed.  And satting just fine.  So what does your kid do to get out of church?

If you don't want to do something, 
one excuse is as good as another.  
~Yiddish Proverb